Helicopter Saves Matt Lauer Marriage

Life just isn’t fair.  It’s bad enough Matt Lauer gets to fork young thots, and keep his wife.  Now NBC has granted him a trophy for womanizing the entertainment industry.  Paparazzi busted the mega rich senior citizen floating on his boat in the Hamptons, with his finger up a young, blonde poochie.  Annette Roque is just too old, and tired to divorce.


An eyewitness told The ENQUIRER that Matt and the woman “acted suspicious” after they noticed a photographer snapping their picture. “If they didn’t have anything to hide, then why did the girl duck and try to cover her head to avoid being photographed?” said the eyewitness.

“Matt also acted like he’d been busted. After spotting the photographer, he quickly pulled his boat up to the dock and dropped the lady off before gunning the boat back out onto the water.

Matt Lauer earns a measley $21.5 million a year.  Hollyweird claims he has almost as many side chics, as Hampton luxury properties.  Annette knows her husband is a serial cheater.  Jessica Thorman nearly ruined the newly weds in 1998.  Matt hated that he loved smashing Natalie Morales, but she was one of many.  A mustang kick to the forehead for you, is the icing on Matt’s juicy cake.  In wake of the cheating scandal, executives are dishing additional millions for Matt’s daily, private, helicopter rides to & from his Hamptons estate.

Will a free ride home strengthen the marriage?  Is Annie headed for reality Tv’s casting couch?  How long will Matt endure the misery of his marriage?  Will his 2nd wife be a lesbian?  Can NBC give us a call?