Howard Stern Called Sam Smith Fat Ugly & Gay

The Sony hack didn’t mention has-beens.  Howard Stern is overwhelmed by technology, and doesn’t understand the point of  social media.  Stern’s popularity is Joan Rivers.  Holly’s weirdos are waiting for a refreshing shift change, so he began hating on Sam Smith’s success.

“You know what I like about the guy? He’s an ugly motherf*****. He’s fat.”

Howard Stern’s looks prevented him from excelling in television, but he just kept going in on Sam.  Stern, his Jheri curl afro, and anorexic wife, are stuck in the 60s.  With more chins than the law allows, and a face only a mother could love, Howard slammed Sam.

“Is he gay? You know what, he looks gay to me, not that anybody looks gay, but he does seem effeminate.  I like that he’s chubby and gay. That’s why I love him. He’s one of those guys I feel like, he’s really good but I feel like that will be his only hit song.”

Howard Stern’s brazen attitude is why he lasted so long.  Over time, he began befriending Tinseltown’s producers and executives.  Lately, he’s been more into kissing Hollywood’s ass, than ripping it.  All of the entertainers are his ‘friends’ now.  Howard’s listeners dropped quicker than a Kardashian’s panties.  Sam Smith felt the wrath because Stern needs to rekindle his flaming passion.

“That’s how good that song is. He’s fat and he’s gay and little girls worship him. That’s when you know you have a good song and you have a good voice.”

He cried, but Sam Smith is also honored.

“I’d like to get him in here to congratulate him on beating the odds. He’s like the male Adele.”