Jessica Simpson Gay Dad Ruined Her Career

Jessica’s music career has officially washed along the Pacific Coast.  Ashlee Simpson’s new baby has Jessica leaning on food, alcohol, and pills.  While a percocet pizza may be normal in Hollyweird, a preaching gay dad is not.  Jessica Simpson decided to replace her body issues, and career struggles,with a showmance and 2 kids.  Simpson’s clothing company has earned her millions, but fans fear a breakdown coming on.  Santa Monica’s pot heads are worried Simpson will eventually crack under pressure.

Jessica Simpson is always trying to resolve her parents constant bickering.  Pastor Joe Simpson hasn’t really spoken to Jess since he sashayed out the closet, and got busted with a $1000 a night male prostitute.  Joe embarrassed the family when he was photographed at NYC Fashion Week drooling over Sam Sarpong during a steamy performance.  Did we mention Papa Joe’s e- cigarette addiction, or how he wears the same wrinkled camouflage vest  everyday ?

Dad and daughter night out: Jessica and her dad Joe attended The Greenbrier for the gala opening of the Casino Club on July 2, 2010 in White Sulphur Springs, West Virginia

Eric Johnson has cemented his slot as the white Stedman.  Jessica Simpson wants another baby to deflect fans from her stale music.  Tinseltown refuses to inject marketing funding into Jessica.  She no longer holds the star power to headline a movie, but her pride doesn’t like being cast as an extra.  Maxwell thinks her dad is her “boyfriend”.  Do you think Jessica Simpson dresses nicely?

“If I’m not wearing a good outfit, I can’t sing a good song,” according to Jess.  That’s weird? She has never sung a good song.