Portia de Rossi Leaving Ellen Degeneres For A Man

We’re no Phil Robertson.  Being gay has nothing to do with bestiality.  Ellen Degeneres has a lot of limelight at stake, but Hollyweird sources say Portia de Rossi is leaving for good.  It’s not Ellen’s long hours, and grey whiskers convincing Portia to bounce.  Insiders say Rossi wants some penis.

Back when Portia de Rossi was pimping her anorexia book, A Story of Loss and Gain, she confessed the truth to Oprah.  “I had always really loved men- and still do.”

Is Portia just letting Ellen lick her kitten for a little shine?  Another ‘gay for pay’ showmance, like Derek Hough and Mark Ballas?  Ellen Degeneres cannot shake the feeling that Rossi wants some male penetration.  After all, Anne Heche dumped her for a dude who wasn’t even rich.  Ellen was heartbroken.  Some say she considered suicide.  The 15 year age gap between Degeneres, and Portia only fuels the Emmy queen’s insecurities.

It Gets Worse